Monday, November 9, 2009 ♣
Let me hold you for the last time
It's the last chance to feel again
But you broke me,
now I can't feel anything.
You’re the only one I wish I could forget
The only one I’d love to not forgive
And though you break my heart, you’re the only one
And though there are times when I hate you
Cause I can’t eraseThe times that you hurt me
And put tears on my face
And even now while I hate you
It pains me to sayI know
I’ll be there at the end of the day
Those are part of the lyrics from a song I really like. Broken hearted girl and broken string. Yes people. I am THAT broken hearted. As much as I hate to admit it,I am deeply hurt about whatever had happen before.
I'm scared. I'm scared to fall in love. I'm scared to feel love. I'm scared of giving out my heart. I'm just scared. Call me pathetic but I've been in and out of relationship several times and it thought me the more mature I am,the more hurt I'll get. I'm not anti-love or anything,but since young,I was craving to be loved and being in love. When I got the chance to give out all the love I had,something gotta be wrong. Things didnt work out. I know I'm still young and being serious in a relationship is not a wise decisions.
Well,I know I have a LOOONNNNGGGG way to go in this life. There are far more things to worry about apart from love. I have great friends around me. I have a mother who is like my bestfriend,a dad who supports me financially. Friends back home are just sweethearts. Friends here in Sunway are just amazing. Their words of motivation and comfort,their hugs that makes me feel so secure. I couldnt ask for more. I'm not taking them for granted. Never did. I'm just thankful to have them next to me right now. Afterall,they are what I call "Family" when I'm here.
I guess as heart broken as I am,there are far more things that is worth my tears. Perharps,NOTHING is worth my tears. That's right. Even death. My parents. I know crying wont do anything. I know it makes u feel better but that's it. It's my believe that nothing is worth my tears. So,DONT make assumptions aite?
Life is all good as u can see. We're getting internet soon. I dont even know when. Pictures will be uploaded in facebook and also in this blog. Just keep dropping by aite?
RANDOMNESS!
2:29 AM
Tuesday, October 27, 2009 ♣
I'm updating this thing again.
I'm in the web and it's freakishly cold. Maybe it's because I'm wearing a dress or maybe it's because I'm sitting under the air-cond.
So let me update u with the things that has been happening.
I've moved in to a new place. (guess I've said that earlier)
I'm currently addicted to Arabic songs AGAIN.
Still and always be touched and moved by the song "Dont fall in love" by Ne-yo.
I'm healed?!
I'm moving on??!!
I love my room.
end of story...
hahaha....There's nothing more to elaborate though. There's nothing much happening in my life. Well,there is a lot of things to do and places to hustle around bt overall,it's all good. My body clock is fucked up as usual and I'm not sure if I'm gaining or losing weight. At this moment,I couldnt care less since all of my clothes still fits. Hahaha....laugh people. It's a joke. (lame,I know.)
Oh! I do have a problem....ECONOMICALLY. It's going down like the river flowing. God! With only 500 every month,I can go crazy. It's not that I'm going shopping or anything but my need for food and other things to survive is so COSTLY. Grr...I should have someone else to sponsored me. Hahahaha....
I've learned a lot of few things as well. I can say that I'm much more stronger than how I used to be before. Not physically (LOL!!) but mentally. I'm glad and happy just the way it is. I've learned to appreciate my surroundings and accept some certain things the way they are. I've also know what I really wanna do in my life. What I'm supposed to do to achieve it.
Apart from that,this is how my life gets. Hustling,dissing,lazing around and sleeping! Oh God! I've been crazy over sleeping. I can sleep for hours and I've been waking up at 6.30 am almost everyday. Jesz too actually. She checks up on me all the time and me being me will wake up everytime someone enters my room or just open the door. LOL..I swear living with the girls is one of the best decision I made ever. It's fun and the house is awesome. We're planning to buy more things to decorate the place and also I need to buy more things for my room. It's too plain and it looks like a office. Hahaha..
That's enough of updates. My fingers are literally frozen. This place is fucking cold...brrr!!
Cheers people!
RANDOMNESS!
6:49 PM
Sunday, October 25, 2009 ♣
A quick update....
We moved in to our new house and let me tell yea,
IT.IS.NOT.EASY.
But I had fun living with my girls. I love the new house. I love the environment. I love my room. LOL.
Anyway,I really got to go now. Tons of things to do and I'll update this when I'm free.
Cheers.
RANDOMNESS!
9:17 PM
Friday, October 9, 2009 ♣
I'm sorry for abandoning this blog for quite a while now. There is so much things going on. We're always on the go nowadays. Even if it takes sleepless nite.
Anyway,dont worry,life is awesome nowadays. There was so many things and emotions I was feeling yet it's all good. It just turn my sway on. My girls are always here. Bile too. All the people I need in my life is right by my side helping me facing all the shits. My parents are fine though. Not much of a chaos back home. It's good to know that way.
Hopefully by next week,we're moving to our new house. Fi,Jesz and myself. Our own place to chill and be stoned. HAHAHA..I'm joking. So yeah,we're moving in by next week. I'm getting my own room by myself. No more freaky roomate and I can be as messy as I want. Hahaha..and I can bring more people in without actually being worried what others might think. The new house will also mean more relaxing at our own place. Again,being stoned and knocking out everywhere. HAHAHAHAHA...
U know,after soooo long of listening to the song "Te Amo',I actually got the meaning by Fi earlier today while chilling at RSB with our tea on the table. LOL. Call me pathetic bt like I told her earlier ... "the experience is much more meaningful rather than the meaning of the song". She end up giving me her "DUH!" face. My bad woman,I can't help it. You know what actually happen during the song. *blush*
What else should I say? Oh! I'm depressed and heartbroken. I'm being heartless and I'm tired of pretending. I'm tired of this game. I'm just tired of everything. The girls,Fi,Jesz and Sharlene was there to listened to my confessions and everything. Thank you so so much. I really need that. Bile was there too. There's no other words for me to thanked u guys for what happen.
For a moment,I really want other humans to stop judging and thinking of the way we roll. If you got a problem,then fuck it. It's not that we're bothering u innit??
GGAAAHHH! I'm just gonna let everything go. I'll update more next time.
RANDOMNESS!
2:04 PM
Thursday, October 1, 2009 ♣
I'm back to Selangor. Back to Sunway. Back to my kind of life. It's been awesome so far. I'm moving in with Jesz and Fi next week. InshaAllah.
Anywho,there's so much to blog about that I have no idea where to start. First thing first,I get to meet my somali family again. We're closer than ever. Yesterday I was spending SO much time with Bile I got tired of his "shame on you" quote. I actually dreamt about it. Apart from that,it's all good. Been hanging out a lot. Later tonite we are all going to PD for chilling. CAMPFIRE!!
Anywho,I'm just gonna chill for now. I aint doing much either. Probably more chilling with Bile and the guys. The girls of course and some other random person. :))
I have to go now. I'll update this thing later aite? Have fun people.
RANDOMNESS!
6:07 AM
Thursday, September 24, 2009 ♣
Eid Mubarak 0'9.
This has been one of the eventful time of this year. Thanks TGL. Family too.
Awesome syawal.
RANDOMNESS!
10:21 PM
